I Look For Lexical Gaps and Dead Bodies in my Spare Time... in your pants.

So, I have been fairly lazy for the past few weeks. Ever since that crazy trip to Florida, which disrupted my writers flow, I've lost all of my motivation. But HEY, sucks for me, because I have Liam sitting here yelling at me about how I should not be a nast little hypocrite, telling people all of this "I do not write for myself, but for others" stuff and then backing out on them. To which I generally flick him off of my shoulder and go eat some ice cream. But finally tonight, I've decided to listen to him. I was talking to my mother about the topics for this blog, and discussed how I'm going to give you all an ironic blog, because I'm tired of writing about serious things. She replied that technically, the blog is more satirical than ironic. And TECHNICALLY, she's right. But I happen to like describing it as ironic, so this blog is satirical, but disguised as ironic.  Like, the satire in it is Superman, and we're using the word irony to be the Clark Kent and disguise it poorly. But anyway, on to the actual blog topic. Some people play "I spy", or "Where's Waldo", or something along those lines. I have a somewhat more interesting way to spend long car rides with friends. We look for dead bodies. Or, more specifically, the best place to stash them. The only rule is that every dumpster holds at least one dead body. It's required. But other places are somewhat more creative. We've found stretches of forest, abandoned strip malls, gosh, they're everywhere. No serial killers could ever pull one over on ME! I know all of their dump sites. Yes, it's a rather morbid game. But also a good way to occupy time. Try it out sometime, you'll be amazed at how creeped out you can get. o.0
But another, slightly less creepy way to occupy time, is to look for lexical gaps. This is a trick I learned fron Hank Green, one of the amazing Vlog Brothers. (Hilarious vlogs, I laughed until I cried. RECOMMENDED.) A lexical gap is a word for when there should be a word for something, but there isn't. Take shallow. There is no word for shallow in Romanian. :o instead, you have to use 'not so very deep'. What a pain, what a lexical gap! So, you can sit down with all of your favorite adjectives (or even discriptive nouns or verbs), and try to come up with antonyms for them. If you can't, you've found a LEXICAL GAP! Now, this may sound boring, but once you start, it's hard to stop. And when you find a lexical gap, you always want to plug it. Take the example they used. Virgin. Well, what's the word for when someone is no longer a virgin? There ISN'T one in english! (but ironically, there is one in Romanian.) So, let's bridge the gap- virgout.Thumbs up if you think that is as hilariously brilliant as I do.
Another point the Vlog Brothers brought out is that every single book title you have in your house sounds funny if you add 'in your pants' to the end of it. <3
examples:
"the unspeakable crime of andrea yates in your pants."
"little women in your pants"
"the lovely bones in your pants"
:o i won't even comment on those, but you'll see that it works just as well with any other titles you can think of. :)
And, that's really all I have in my system as far as writing goes tonight. I'm getting kind of sleepy, and have deided that although it is only eleven, i will go to bed, because A) the person that I want to text me has in fact stopped texting me and B) i don't sleep during the week, so my weekend is my catch-up time. So, I'm off, and I'm sure Liam will do his best to yell at me and make sure you guys get another blog tommorow. Love.