Should I Sing the Descant, or be a Good Example?? // Good Boys/Girls in Henry County versus True Beauty

AUGUST 30
So, I have found my most recent ally in William- I think we can make it through this year together. We're both members of the Spivey Hall Children's Choir. For various reasons (financial for me, not sure about him), we had to move from the part of the choir that tours to the part of the choir that well, doesn't. It's been one heck of a transition. Of course we're nostalgic, and we miss all of our friends in tour choir, but I think we're happy to have someone else to share the experience with.  It's pretty legit- Spivey is a beautiful place full of beautiful personalities, where we make beautiful music, and it is such an honor for me to be a part of it. Dr. Shaw is one of my heroes. She directs the choir, and throughout my many years with her, she's taught me so many important lessons, from going ahead and hitting the deer, to kindness, to personal greatness, to how to act in a college interview. (I'm Serious.... 'everything i need to know i learned in childern's choir'. period.) She is such an amazing lady, and I am proud to call her my adopted mom. <3  I hope to enjoy the rest of my amazing Mondays in that amazing choir.

AUGUST 31
I am SO SICK of my friends basing their self image off of some guy or girl they like!! It's maddening to see my best friend sell herself short just because she wouldn't compromise her ideals, or my other wonderful friend down on himself because the girl he likes isn't smart enough to return the sentiment. And then there's the mass amount of friends I have who are convinced that something is wrong with them JUST because they aren't in a relationship. I've just about had it. I can see how beautiful, and smart, and wonderful and talented and amazing and god knows how many other adjectives these people are, and yet they still think they aren't good enough. It breaks my heart, really and truly. Please, I'd like to send a message to all of you who base your self esteem on someone else, it's NOT WORTH IT. You are a wonderful, whole person. Why do you want a 'soul mate' anyway? To quote Naomi and Eli's NO Kiss List, "I don't want half a shared soul. I want my own damn soul." And to be completely legit, Henry County is kind of a fail. There aren't many people here who can truly appreciate what's in front of them. As for me? I'm taking to one of my best friends, and that's how it should be. I was happy by myself as a complete person, and he enriches my life. It's like an outfit- he's the diamond earrings. They're GREAT, but I have to wear other things to. I just beg you to be comfortable with yourself, and love yourself. You can do so many wonderful things. And when your special someone comes along and knocks you off your feet (and they will, I promise), let them enrich your life- don't let them BE it. You owe it to yourself and them- You aren't half of the same piece, you're complimentary beautiful items on your own.

Kayla and Kara are TAYLORGANG BOSSES. (warning: offensive material)

Honoring the recent revelation that this blog is morbid as crap, I'd like to be premature here and crown my big sister Kayla Travis the QUEEN OF TAYLOR GANG. <3 What an honor. For all of you who live under rocks, Taylor Gang is a group of people associated with the amazing WIZ KHALIFA. The saying is "TAYLORGANG OR DIE", but we like to get a tad bit more creative. We had a Taylor Gang war tonight on facebook, which really didn't prove anything except that we are fairly demented. From 10-11:30 tonght, the contest was, 'who can make a better taylorgang slogan?'
here are a few of the more great/horrifying ones:
"taylor gang or lick a chainsaw"
"taylorgang or bound, tortured, killed"
"taylor gang or go hunting with that guy who went hunting with his kid and shot the kid cause he thought the kid was a turkey."
"taylorgang or dress as a jew and get sealed inside Al Capone’s vault with a phalanx of Neo-nazis armed with folding chairs"
"taylor gang or get bubonic plague and have big bags of black skin full of puss on your neck and armpits. then bump against a table and have the bag of pus burst and squirt into your mouth."
"taylor gang or stab yourself to death with colored pencils"
"taylorgang or get infested and colonized by scabies mites (eyeless, brainless parasites unique to humans—perfectly evolved to afflict us) ,Succumb to the maddening itch, and skin yourself alive."

yes, we have psychological issues, don't judge. but anyway, we duked it out for an hour and a half. it's voting time, open to members of facebook, and she prettymuch is taylorganging me. :) because she is epic. go congratulate her in this exciting honor, will you? <333

It's a Boy!!!!

So, I am now offically the mommy of an ADORABLE baby boy, Alexander Brayden Ross. (For those of you who know me, you know my obsession with Ryan Ross, and you can put together the last name. :D) He goes by Brayden, and he was delivered at 3:57 pm today! And by 4:30, he was dead. OKAY, so in light of the recent circumstances, that wasn't in the best taste. I got my electronic baby in Human Growth and Development today. Mine's a hispanic baby boy- YES, it comes equipped, and I am VERY sure of it's gender. :o. But I DID think I killed it. It started crying, at 4;15, and then all of a sudden clickclickclicked, and went SILENT. I couldn't get it to cry or anything! I was highly distraught, and seriously questioning my parenting abilities. HOWEVER, I took little Brayden to the game and his godmother (my teacher) managed to fix it.... his battery was dead. I went through some extreme emotional distress worrying about him, though. GOSH, parenting is so stressful. Everyone remind me not to get pregnant? Thanks! haha. Supposedly, he is reset and will start crying around 11 tonight... I guess I'll let you guys know how that goes. Buddha, grant me patience. Expect updates on Brayden tommorow all. <3

An Ocean of Blue

Today was the most emotionally drained I've been in a long time. I seriously came home and crashed. But when I woke up, I knew what I was going to write this about, and that is the absolute unity that Union Grove High School was invvolved in today. Let's all be honest- we are just like every other school. We have feuds, we hold grudges. This group of people doesn't like that group of people; you're mean to me so I'm going to be mean back. We have our 20 or so friends that we like and hang out with, and we either dislike or ignore everyone else. Don't deny it, because you know it's true. We dislike on principle, and that's strong and hard to put aside. But simply the fact that, as I walked into the commons area and was hit by a sea of blue was enough to bring me to tears. It was the most amazing sight I've ever seen. For those of you who don't know, blue was Jeremy Hawkin's favorite color, and a mass text message was sent around instructing people to wear blue in his memory. It was the fastest moving text I think I've ever seen- I recieved it from about 6 people and sent it to everyone in my contacts list.  People that profess to hate each other were all a part of it. What truly hit me was when I saw all of the people I was fighting with, the people I claim to dislike, all wearing blue just like I was. It's a grieving process. For everyone. It's knocked us all onto the same level- we're all hurt, we're all confused, and we're all a little scared. But it's okay, because it brought us together. You know, I didn't know Jeremy Hawkins. But if he loved people anywhere near as much as everyone said he did, It's my opinion that he'd be proud that the tradgedy of his death was able to bring us together. I think he'd be glad that, if it was in fate's cards that he had to die, then at least it had a positive impact. Thank you Jeremy, for everything you've taught us, and everything you're still teaching us. It means a great deal.

Today- Mortality, and Living.

To be entirely honest, I didn't even know Jeremy Hawkins. I can't tell you facts about his personality. I can't tell you what he liked or disliked. I can't even tell you what he looked like. And yet, he has impacted me. I'd like to first offer my empathy and sympathy to anyone who knew him, as well as to his family and Mac. To be honest, I almost feel like I'm making a big scene over something I don't deserve to be upset about. And in a strange way, I suppose, I am. Like I said, I didn't know him. But it shook me up, beyond anything. It's highschool. We aren't supposed to know about these things yet-we're supposed to be invincible. To those who aren't aware of the story, Jeremy Hawkins, a student at Union Grove High School, died today. It was nobody's fault, but a tragic accident. I can't even begin to explain my views on this here. It's something inexplicable, to have mortality pushed in front of you to ponder and explain to yourself. It makes you question your firmest beliefs, and spins you around in circles. It was the strangest thing, when Amada came into the room after school and told us he didn't make it. I guess I just thought he would. I didn't even notice I was crying until Erin asked if I needed a hug. I guess what it did more than anything was make me think. It made me think long and hard. It prompted alot of confessions out of me. For example, even jst right now, I feel more inclined to tell people that I love them, more ready to talk to people that I don't really like, more inspired to repair burned bridges and make new ones. I really think that good can come out of this, as terrible as it is. Maybe if people realize how fragile life can be, they can make the most of it instead of wasting it on petty and stupid arguments and grudges. Live for now, and don't hurt people. Think twice before something nasty comes out of your mouth. They're basic life lessons, but sometimes it makes something drastic for them to mean anything. Please, please don't let this happen in vain. Good can come out of any situation, and that is what needs to happen here. If nothing else, say one kind thing, just one, to someone you usually wouldn't. Let them know you appreciate them, or admire them, or respect them. Then, stop from saying one, just one, cruel thing. Think of him when you do it. Think of what you would do if it were your last day. Because life is too precious to waste.

new blog for kara?

i'll be straight up with you all before i start- i'm not an honest blogger. songs, poems, stories- that i can do. honest opinions and tales? not so much. i'm not much of one for starting drama or controversy, and debates where people try to talk me out of my opinon tend to irritate me. the rules here are: don't read it if you don't like it, don't be immature, and DON'T try to tell me i'm wrong. it's my blog for chrissakes, and my opinions. it's right to me, and if you want to have somewhere where you're always right, go get your own blog. sound fair to everyone? good. so, back to the original point- if i tell a story, 9/10 times i will change names and alter what happened just beyond the point of recognition. don't guess. if you get it wrong, i will laugh and tell you that you are wrong. if you get it right, i will laugh and tell you that you are wrong. sound similar? let's hope so. also, to let everyone know, i'm usually much nicer and less sarcastic when my muse (liam-more about him later) is sitting on my shoulder. basically, my tone's usually much softer when i write. but i supose this is an intro, and intros are meant to catch attention. you'll see later on once i really get into this. but back to the bit about liam. liam (LEE-ahm) is my invisible, elusive little muse who sits on my shoulder and whispers ideas and lyrics to me. some might call him inspiration, but liam was a much more appealing name to me. i picked it for a few reasons. first of all, liam is a shortened form of william. william is a reference to william shakespeare- because of the writing aspect. liam also means, however, 'my people'. and that's who i'm hoping to write for- you. people. everything i write is written for someone else- to enjoy, to feel, to think about. i don't care about influencing you... i just want to connect with you. i guess i sort of hope that on some level, everyone can find something to relate to here in some way or another. writing to me isn't about letting out words, it's about letting out emotions and thoughts. i really appreciate you taking the time to read this, and hope you'll consider checking back from time to time.
peaceandlove,
kara michelle